Graduation day

By Paulette Tobin (5/15/00)

This week, May 17, will be the 27th anniversary of the day the Class of 1973 graduated from Eureka High School. Tonight Emily was telling me that the band at Red River High School has been practicing to play "Pomp and Circumstance" for graduation there. With that stately melody running around my head, I tried to remember some of the details of our graduation day. Most of it is pretty fuzzy after all these years.

It seems to me it was a fine day, sunny and mild. I can't remember what I wore, other than my cap and gown, of course. I do remember all of us in the cafeteria, getting ready to march into the auditorium. There were lots of our parents hanging around taking pictures. I remember marching in with Jim Gebhardt, and because he was valedictorian, and I was his partner, I was the first one in line to receive a diploma. Jim and Charlie Schock, our salutatorian, spoke for our class, but I don't remember what they talked about or much else about the ceremony. I remember being happy and sad, all mixed together.

Orange and yellow were our class colors, and we wore orange and yellow corsages of roses and carnations. I still have mine. It's a little dry and crunchy, but I wore it to our 25-year class reunion in 1998, and I plan to wear it again to our All-School Reunion in Eureka this July.

After my graduation in 1973 Mom and Dad and my brother, Dave, and I went to Grandma Beck's house for a little lunch. That was the extent of my graduation party. Doubtless many of my classmates had more elaborate celebrations, but I don't think any of those soirees in 1973 could hold a candle to some of the shindigs folks are throwing for their graduates today. In recent years, graduation parties have grown into parties of a size and scope that, in some cases, are bigger and more elaborate than some wedding receptions I've attended (including my own).

I have a friend at the Grand Forks Herald whose daughter is graduating. For months she has been painting her kitchen, refinishing woodwork and landscaping in preparation for her daughter's graduation party. Today this friend was telling me about the problems she's been having getting her new carpeting installed, and that the new sofa she ordered hadn't come yet. Her daughter's graduation is Saturday. Things are starting to get a little tense in her life.

I remember when my niece, Lori Haupt, graduated from EHS, and how her graduation fell on the same day as her brother's confirmation. Their parents, Gerry and Patty, managed to combine the two celebrations into one. What a great and fun day that was, with the Eureka senior center packed with friends and relatives. At the time, our Emily was 9, and having to host a graduation party was the farthest thing from my mind. So I wasn't paying much attention to how much work they'd done.

Then a couple of years later, it was Clayton's graduation. This time the party was in the church basement, and I had a little clearer appreciation for my role in the event. As one of the aunties, I decided it was my duty to show up in time to help decorate the hall and prepare the food. Graduation was Sunday, so the slicing and dicing and chopping and grinding of turkey salad began on Saturday. There was Mom, and Clayton's other grandma, Vera Eberhart, my sister June, and various other female relatives. Not that you should think any of this was a hardship. We had a ball.

Then in 1998 my niece, Shandra, Dave and Denise's daughter, graduated in Ord, Neb., so we all trekked down there. That was another great party. We weren't really in time to help with much of the food preparation, but we tried to make up for it by bringing the beer. By the end of the afternoon, some of the people stopping at Shandra's open house had been to 10 or more other parties, and many had that sort of stunned look that one gets after sampling one too many kinds of sandwiches and dip at one too many parties.

Still, who among us can blame the parents of the graduates for wanting to celebrate in a big way? Especially those of us who have children of our own, and who know exactly what they are celebrating? We think of the sacrifices and rewards of parenthood, and all the miles we've traveled to come to this place in our lives. We look at those bright, beautiful young people, so funny, so full of life and promise, and we see the best that was in ourselves. We know what an honor it has been to be a part of their lives. We remember the fun of watching them grow up. And we think of the ones who are no longer with us to celebrate, but whose memories are cherished more than ever and whose absences are more keenly felt on a special day like graduation.

High school graduation is one of those milestone events in our lives, a rite of passage that years later may be dimly remembered, but an important landmark nonetheless in our personal history. Twenty-seven years later, it's still something to celebrate. To all of my classmates, I raise the cup of remembrance for the times we spent together. You will always be very special people in my life! Thanks for years of friendship and many wonderful memories.

(Paulette Haupt Tobin grew up on a farm near Eureka and, after EHS, graduated from SDSU. Today she lives in Grand Forks, N.D. You can email her at [email protected])